Dear Son, Words of Wisdom #14

dear son 14

Dear Son,
“Thank You” are two of the most powerful words you can say.
Love, Dad

“Say thank you,” were words your heard from your mother and I many times while you were growing up. We were especially vigilant around Christmas and Birthdays. We reminded you several times before we arrived at the gift exchange. You ripped open the colorful paper, full of anticipation to see what amazing wonders awaited, only to be greeted by a 3-pack of underwear. We gave you the look. You took a deep breath and somewhat convincingly said, ‘Thank you.”

Saying “Thank You” is not always natural or easy – but it is always powerful. Showing gratitude has a deep impact on the receiver of the “Thank You”. They feel appreciated, loved, respected – and they will be twice as likely to continue the activity that prompted the “Thank You”. Being grateful is also very beneficial to your own health and well being. Psychological studies have demonstrated this “Gratitude Effect”.  Click here to watch an enlightening video by Derek Halpern about the power of “Thank You”

pt thank youHere is a super powerful secret:  “Thank You” notes are like a “Thank You” on steroids with lasers strapped to its back. It is a vanishing art that will not go unnoticed. In fact, I have a “Thank You” note you gave me on a special shelf in my office.

Thank God
Also remember to thank God for all of the blessings in your life. God is the true source. “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights.” James 1:17(NIV)

What would today look like if you only had what you thanked God for yesterday?

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Dear Son, Words of Wisdom #13

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Dear Son,
Don’t wait for someone to tell you what to do…find it.

I did not discover this secret to success in a business class or book. I discovered it in a funeral home.

I had the privilege to work and live in a funeral home the summer after graduating from college. I mowed the grass, greeted people and moved a few dead bodies (that may sound cold, but so were the bodies). I had low expectations for the job. I was just killing time until I found my career. I was wrong. I had much to learn, and the funeral home was a great place to do it.

I did what I was told  – nothing more – nothing less.
“Cut the grass.” I cut the grass then waited.
“Blow off the sidewalks.” I blew them spotless then sat down and waited.
“Help me move this body.” I moved the body, washed my hands, then waited.
I was dong my job and feeling good about myself.

After a couple weeks, the funeral director came to me and said, “You are wearing me out.” I was shocked. I was a college graduate and was doing everything they asked, how could there be a problem. He continued, “I am tired of having to find stuff for you to do all day. You need to look around…walk around…there is stuff that needs to be done everywhere.”

It was like a light bulb turned on in my head. In all my years of working in restaurants and going to school, no one shared this amazing wisdom with me. I put it into practice, and it has given me great advantages over those that sit around and wait to be told what to do.

Do what you are told to do with excellence – plus look around and find things that need to be done. You will be noticed, appreciated and rewarded with greater opportunities.

One side note: when you find something to do, make sure to let them know and get approval before you do it.

“Take a lesson from the ant, you who love leisure and ease.
Observe how it works, and dare to be just as wise. 
It has no boss, no one laying down the law or telling it what to do,
Yet it gathers its food through summer and takes what it needs from the harvest.”
Proverbs 6:6-8 (The Voice)

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Dear Son, Words of Wisdom #12

seek truth speak truth

Dear Son,
Seek truth. Speak truth. Love, Dad

In a world filled with lies and spin, the value of truth is ever increasing. David described our society well when he wrote, “You love evil more than good and lies more than truth.”(Psalms 52:3)

Your mother and I have made truth a high priority in our home. We also placed you in a classical, Christian school with the mission of teaching you to seek God’s truth. As you grow older, it will be up to you to put this into practice.

Jesus said, “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” Truth leads to freedom. Lies and spin lead to a lack of trust, confusion, complications, fear and bondage.

Seek truth about God, yourself and others.  

Truth about God is found in the Bible and in the world around us. Read the Bible and pray the Holy Spirit will guide you into all truth.

Examine yourself. Self-deception is an easy trap. As St. Augustine wrote in Confessions, “Man’s love of truth is such that when he loves something that is not the truth, he pretends to himself that what he loves is the truth, and because he hates to be wrong, he will not allow himself to be convinced that he is deceiving himself. So he hates the real truth for the sake of what he takes to his heart in its place.”

Seek truth about others. Do not form an opinion about others to quickly. Do not automatically believe the word of others without proper investigation and consideration. Things are not always as they seem.

Speak truth.

God has a very high opinion of speaking truth and a very low opinion of lying. Proverbs 12:19 reads, “Truthful words stand the test of time, but lies are soon exposed.” Proverbs 6 is a list of seven things God hates and two of them are speaking lies.

Speaking truth is practical and leads to success. I have seen many lives destroyed through the lies they have told. As Sir Walter Scott wrote, “O, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.” Make a practice of speaking truth. It may not seem to be the easiest choice at the moment, but truth wins in the end.

In a world suffocating in lies, truth will breathe life and freedom. Be a leader who seeks truth and speaks truth.

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Dear Son, Words of Wisdom #11

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Dear Son,
In all you do (even if it seems small or stupid), give it your all, as if you are doing it for God, not people.
Love, Dad

As you continue through school and launch out into the workplace, you will question the task and responsibilities you are given.  At times, you will feel that it is a waste of time or beneath you. You must have the proper perspective and patience.

Perspective changes everything. In order to have a proper perspective, we must understand who our boss actually is. Colossians 3:23 sheds light, “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.”  When we understand God is our boss, it gives dignity and elevates any task.

In life, we tend to categorize activities as either spiritual or human. We imagine that going to church or on a mission trip is spiritual but doing homework or mowing grass is just human activity. When we understand all we do is for God, nothing should be viewed as small or stupid.

You will also need patience. When you are new, you will have to prove yourself. Trust is built over time. In my own career and as I manage those in my care, I find the words of Jesus to be true, “If you’re faithful in small-scale matters, you’ll be faithful with far bigger responsibilities.” Luke 16:10

Do not let your current task or responsibilities suffer while you are waiting for the big, important stuff. Meet each task with willingness, energy and creativity. It will be noticed and rewarded.

Many times we think we are ready, but there are so many lessons to learn and endurance to build. God has great things ahead of you, but you must prepare yourself for that day. I love God’s response to Jeremiah when he felt like God was not moving fast enough, “If you have raced with men on foot and they have worn you out, how can you compete with horses?” Jeremiah 12:5

Pray that God gives you the perspective and patience to become the man of God you are intended to be.

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Dear Son, Words of Wisdom #10

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Dear Son,
Ask God for wisdom and courage every morning.
Love, Dad

Your mother and I have given time and effort to provide education and example to prepare you as you journey into life.  But I am left with concern because I know how unprepared we can be for the things that we face each day. Such an array of confusing choices and difficult decision.

Our only true hope is to trust in God our good shepherd. He must provide the wisdom. We can never gather enough information. We can rarely read intentions. We can’t foresee the unintended consequences. We must ask and allow God to fill in the gaps.

“If you don’t have all the wisdom needed for this journey, then all you have to do is ask God for it; and God will grant all that you need. He gives lavishly and never scolds you for asking.” James 1:5

Wisdom alone is not enough.  You will also need God to give you the courage to do what you are to do. It is one thing to know…it is another thing to do. Many of my regrets revolve around the times I had the wisdom but not the courage to act.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

Be sure to make this a prayer every morning and a priority every day.

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